When men fail in bed, the knee-jerk reaction is to blame ourselves.
We are conditioned to believe that a healthy man is so virile that he can get a hard-on in any sexual encounter – no matter the quality. Nothing is further from the truth. A perfectly healthy man still needs to be aroused.
Often, the woman fails to do her part in turning the man on.
Here are the 5 things women do that KILLS boners:
1. Being too aggressive
As I detail in my book, erections require two things, arousal and relaxation.
Some women approach sex in an aggressive manner. This gives off masculine energy and does not create an atmosphere of relaxation. They mistakenly try to be “good in bed” by emulating the sex scenes in movies and pornography. While some men may like this, the vast majority of men prefer a more relaxed vibe.
The crazy stuff can be fun, but LATER – once the relationship is more familiar.
2. Poor feminine hygiene
Smell is a powerful sense. It directly influences the brain’s center for emotion.
A smelly vagina will eradicate arousal.
The best tactic is to lead her into the shower. Once there, you can do your best to sanitize the area under the pretenses of foreplay.
If in a long term relationship, the shower routine will get old. The topic must be broached – albeit with sensitivity. Put yourself in her shoes. It can’t be easy to keep a moist body cavity fresh.
3. Being a “starfish”
There is a certain segment of the female population that thinks that there role in sex is to lay on the bed like a starfish and do nothing but receive your thrusts. This is more common with extremely pretty girls that coast on their looks and don’t work as hard as their less beautiful peers.
Getting a man hard should be a team effort. Event if not necessary, it is simply more fun. Her hands and mouth should be eagerly helping your dick to reach its full potential. This is just sexual courtesy 101.
4. Ignoring a man’s VISUAL needs
Men are most stimulated through our eyes. A competent sexual partner should understand this and indulge it.
Lots of girls are self-conscious and demand that the lights be turned off. This immediately puts the man at a huge disadvantage in the erection department.
Women need to understand that when a man is horny, he is very forgiving with regards to a woman’s physical flaws. Men are happy to see just about any relatively healthy girl naked.
A girl should give the man ample eye candy in the lead up to sex.
5. Not being vocal
Every sense that you have is plugged into your brains arousal circuitry. The more senses that are stimulated the better the chance for an erection.
Just the slightest moaning or purring from the woman can set a man’s libido on fire.
So what can you do if she is bad in bed?
In the first few encounters there is not a lot you can do. You are at the mercy of luck as to whether there is good chemistry or not. Such is life.
If you decide to persevere through the first lukewarm encounters, your can optimize things.
You need to tell her what you want, BUT you have do it in the right way. Be confident, clear – and playful. You need to frame it as, “this is what I like” rather than, “this is what you are doing wrong.”
A good woman will be happy to learn what you like and give it to you. If she doesn’t care enough to make an effort, drop her and look for a better girl.
Take this opportunity to learn what she likes as well. Turning her on will also turn you on. Win-Win.
